A Sonnet for Art the Clown

I ran into Art the Clown

At a pizza shop open late

He sawed my friend’s body in half

A different woman’s face, he ate

His oil black teeth give me nightmares

His sketchy bag full of god knows what

The way he sits silently and stares

You know he’s about to fuck shit up

I used to feel bad for clowns

For causing fear instead of joy

But I get why Art causes frowns

That mother fucker is here to destroy

And if you see Art lurking on your street

Rest assured its your maker you will meet

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Let’s Talk About That “IT” Trailer…

…because it literally gave me chills. The day is finally here! Director Andy Muschietti tortured us via Instagram with images of numbered red balloons for the last several days. It didn’t take long for fans to decipher that it was a countdown to the release of the first teaser trailer for Muschietti’s upcoming adaptation of “IT”. We now finally have our first official look at Muschietti’s vision of Derry, ME and the Losers Club.

Watch it HERE:

As a faithful fan of Stephen King’s novel, I am eager to see how the full movie ends up. It will be an epic disappointment if the film panders to the high-school “jump scare horror” crowd. This fantastic first trailer gives me hope, but as we all know, too much “hype” can be a killer of movie dreams. Let’s take a deep breath and say a prayer to horror jesus that Muschietti respects the King. Nothing will top the book, but we don’t have to be complete assholes about our expectations. Let’s give “IT” a chance. Trailer looks phenomenal!

What did you think? Comment below!

31 Nights of Horror V, Night 4: It (novel)

31 Nights of Horror V, Night 4: It (novel)


Three sentence review:

Everyone remembers Tim Curry’s iconic performance as Pennywise the Clown, but beyond that the 1990 made-for-tv adaptation of Stephen King’s daunting 1,000+ page novel It is just straight up garbage. The book is a MUST read that is a thousand times darker and complex, and is one of the best examples of Stephen King’s ability to let the reader really, really get to know his hyper realistic characters. The sinister history of Derry and every Loser Club member back story sticks with you long after you finish (as if it really happened), and I pray that director Andy Muschietti finally gives my all time favorite novel the quality film adaptation it sorely deserves.

How to get extra nerdy:

  1. Wear a leather jacket and tell everyone the moon is talking to you
  2. Wear a Derry, ME tshirt while reading
  3. Make your own newspaper sailboat!