31 Nights of Horror V, Night 3: 31

31 Nights of Horror, Night 3: 31

Three sentence review:

One of the most polarizing figures in horror is Rob Zombie (and don’t even get people started on his wife and my girl crush Sheri Moon). Loved his latest, 31, which seems like a huge “F you” to everyone who hates his movies because it is by far his most in-your-face and unfiltered effort to date. A psycho Spanish speaking little person with a Hitler ‘stache is only the beginning of bizarre horrors a group of friends must survive (including the AMAZING Meg Foster who is SEVENTY YEARS OLD) in the insanely violent and deadly game of 31.

How to get extra nerdy:

1. Watch every Rob Zombie movie in chronological order

2. Listen to Hellbilly Deluxe while speaking nonsense in German 

Night 11, The Devil’s Rejects

31 Nights of Horror, Night 11: The Devil’s Rejects

Three grammatically incorrect sentences review:

There’s so much I love about Rob Zombie’s best movie to-date, The Devil’s Rejects, and I proudly consider myself a dedicated member of its cult following.   Sid Haig reprises his role as Captain Spaulding;  a psychotic, vulgar clown and patriarch of the Firefly family, and the movie focuses on the Firefly’s cat-and-mouse game with the ruthless local police department (meanwhile they run amok in a murderous rampage).  The Devil’s Rejects is equal parts grindhouse, Texas Chainsaw Massacre and the Manson family – nonsensical violence mixed with campy humor and lots of gore – and I’ll always wonder how Rob Zombie ended up marrying someone as pretty as Sherri Moon Zombie.

The awesome Bill Moseley as Otis, a merciless member of the Firefly family.
Ben & Jerry’s. Please. Release. This.

Chinese, Japanese, Dirty knees, Look at these,