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A Sonnet for Art the Clown

I unfortunately met Art the Clown

At a local pizza shop nearby

He sawed my friend’s body upside down

That medieval torture shit made me cry

His disgusting black teeth give me nightmares

His sketchy bag is full of god knows what

The way he sits silent when he stares

You know he’s about to fuck shit up

I never understood the fear of clowns

Their very purpose is to spread joy

But I understand why Art causes frowns

That mother fucker is here to destroy

So if you see Art lurking on the street

Rest assured its your maker you will meet

 

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31 Nights of Horror

31 Nights of Horror V, Night 20: Jeepers Creepers 2

31 Nights of Horror V, Night 20: Jeepers Creepers 2


More than three sentence review:

I think that when the original Jeepers Creepers came out I laughed it off because I couldn’t get past the silly name and the connection to the even sillier song. Fifteen years later, I feel like the “The Creeper” is now a legitimate and recognizable horror villain a la Jason and Freddy. Tonight’s review, however, is about the sequel which I personally like even more than the first installment. It’s what any iconic horror killer needs in a sequel – lots of teenagers and a high body count. Jeepers Creepers is a darker movie that took itself too seriously, and the sequel is the scary yet entertaining popcorn movie we all deserved. Yes, the sequel is definitely  better. I would guess that in the future – hell, probably even now – people will remember the sequel that took place entirely on a school bus more than they remember the first movie.

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31 Nights of Horror, Night 30: KillerFlix (this is AMAZING!)

Instead of a movie review, I’m recommending an awesome resource. My incredible former boss and friend, Kim, just introduced me to the greatest thing ever: KillerFlix. Looking for some awesome horror suggestions? Look no further. This site has ALL of your horror recommendation needs. KillerFlix allows you to choose the type of horror movie you’re interested in watching (ghost story, scary, b-movie, funny, artsy, gory, violent, thriller, monster, slasher) then asks you if you care whether the movie is “good” or not. Then…voila!

You instantly have a thorough list of recommendations at your disposal. Not only does KillerFlix recommend movies for you, it allows you to watch the trailer, read a review, and also takes you straight to the Amazon instant video link where you can watch the movie.

Check it out! http://www.killer-flix.com/

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31 Nights of Horror, Uncategorized

31 Nights of Horror IV, Night 25: Freddy vs. Jason

31 Nights of Horror IV, Night 25: Freddy vs. Jason

Three sentence review:

I gotta be honest, I always get slightly fatigued by the end of the month. But luckily AMC’s Fear Fest re-energized me today by showing the always entertaining Freddy vs. Jason. All you need to know is KELLY ROWLAND IS IN THIS.

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31 Nights of Horror

31 Nights of Horror IV, Night 23: In The Mouth of Madness

I am SO excited tonight to feature a GUEST POST for the very first time on Katie Loves Horror. My friend and former co-worker, Ellis, has been a supporter of the blog since day one and I couldn’t be more thrilled that he agreed to write a guest post about a movie he recommended to me a few years ago. I finally took his advice and watched John Carpenter’s In the Mouth of Madness. I couldn’t agree more with what Ellis wrote below!

31 Nights of Horror IV, Night 23: *GUEST POST* In the Mouth of Madness

“This is a 1994 film directed by one of the kings of horror, John Carpenter. It holds the distinction of being the only (as far as I know) good adaptation of H.P. Lovecraft’s style of horror, probably because it’s not directly based off of one of his short stories and instead borrows the tone.

The film follows an insurance investigator (Sam Neil) trying to find Sutter Cane, a novelist who’s gone missing with the manuscript for his last novel in a set of horror films. The publishing company is understandably eager to get the film, since the anticipated sales figure stand to make Harry Potter look like chump change. He’s joined by a rep from the publishing company (Julie Carmen), and together they try and find the novelist.

This film has held up very well, thanks to Carpenter’s use of prosthetics and puppets as opposed to CG, with the exception of a few scenes. While not terrifying, it’s got great unsettling qualities and benefits from solid performances by both Neill and Carmen. It’s one of the few films that I watch almost every October, and it never gets old. If you’re a fan of psychological horror and Things That Should Not Be Known, give it a shot!”

THANKS ELLIS!!!

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31 Nights of Horror IV, Night 3: Would You Rather

31 Nights of Horror IV, Night 3: Would You Rather

Memorable Quote: In case none of y’all have figured this out, this game isn’t about helping each other. It’s about eliminating the rest of you.

Three sentences review:

Would you rather stab your sick, elderly neighbor with a kitchen knife (in this case – June Squibb) or would you choose to stab yourself instead? This is just a sample of the horrific choices offered by multi-millionaire Shepard Lambrick (played by Jeffrey Combs, Re-Animator) to his desperate-for-money dinner party guests for his own amusement. Brittany Snow (who is no stranger to the horror genre) gives a strong performance in this surprisingly entertaining flick as a twenty something who vows to do anything necessary to save her sick little brother.

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31 Nights of Horror

Night 14, The Birds

31 Nights of Horror, Night 14: The Birds

Three sentence review:

All Hitchcock films are scavenger hunts of symbolism and macguffins, but The Birds is the Gospel of effectively using sound in horror. Bernard Hermann was hired as the composer but he didn’t write any music for the film, rather Hitchcock asked him to focus on incorporating noises and strategic silence that make the birds more menacing and the scenario more dire. Alfred Hitchcock’s films are idolized, but the director himself was a bit of a Norman Bates who had various phobias (eggs, policemen, his mother, etc.) and creepily obsessed over the blonde leads in his films, including Tippi Hedren from The Birds. 

The only Barbie I need!

YES there is an AWESOMELY TERRIBLE sequel to The Birds. It was a TV Movie from 1994. I remember watching it as a kid!

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